#TheWeekThatWas: don’t punch down

The Week That Was

It only occurred to me a few weeks ago that Gwyn in Taking Flight is a bit out of the ordinary, because he’s trans. And some people still find that edgy, or unusual or something to be looked down on.

And this post is to say, I am so sick of that. Of all of it. I’m sick of it from the wider world and I’m sick of it on a smaller, punching-down scale from within the LGBTQIA+ community.

I came across a post on a facebook group the other day where someone was bemoaning all these new genders and sexualities people can identify with. It really, really upset me. It was from someone within the community, who I would therefore hope would have know better. How dare that person imply that identifying as an even more marginalised identity than their own was somehow unacceptable?

We’ve always been here. The fact that there are words now when there weren’t before doesn’t mean we’re new.

Homosexual can only be traced back to 1880. Lesbian has an earlier origin but was only used commonly as a noun to describe same-sex attracted women from about then as well. Transgender dates from the early seventies. These are all labels that are now in common use and have a common cultural meaning to most of us. Labels are helpful for our understanding of ourselves and our understanding of those around us. They’re not cast-iron boxes we’re locked in, they’re a starting point for dialogue and exploration.

Just because you don’t understand the label doesn’t make it any less real.

That goes for those people out there who don’t understand how people can be lesbian, gay or trans, as well as those within the community who can’t understand how one can be non-binary, or bi, or pan, or demi, or use neo-pronouns, or identify however one bloody well wants to.

Don’t punch down, basically. I’m sick of it. I’m sick of living in a racist, ableist, transphobic, discriminatory-on-all-levels society where it’s okay to say these things. I’m sick at myself for not calling this person on their comment. I feel stupid for writing a story about someone very marginalised and not realising what I was doing because to me, being trans is just as normal as not being trans. About the first four iterations of the blurb didn’t mention it, for fuck’s sake! And then I thought… Oh! that might be something readers might like to know about! How stupid is that? There’s a major drama in there, where a prospective lover discovers he’s trans…and it initially didn’t occur to me to put that in the blurb.

Was that because being outed is such an everyday worry to a load of people I know that it was another normal thing for me? Probably. Who knows?

I’m so tired of all of it. Everything is a fight, a fight to force people to be kind. And it shouldn’t be.

K. L. Noone: Magician!

Hi, I’m K.L. Noone—many thanks to A.L. Lester for letting me drop by to talk about Magician today!

K. L. Noone interview. Magician.

Magician comes out July 24 from JMS Books, and it’s m/m high fantasy, with bisexual main characters—at least, Gareth is bi, and Lorre is whatever ancient weary shapeshifting magicians are! (He’s been and done quite a lot, over the years, and at this point what he mostly is…is tired. But Gareth’s got a lot of enthusiasm…)

It’s very much about magic—probably obvious! And also it’s about past mistakes and guilt, and redemption, and trying to hide from the world on a deserted tropical island (because one might as well hide and feel guilty for one’s past mistakes in comfort!), and then it’s about what happens when an optimistic young prince shows up on one’s island and believes with all his heart that the world’s last legendary magician has to help with his quest, because that’s how quests go, isn’t it…

(It’s also the novel I once referred to on Facebook as, “Well, now there’s a lot of tea and magical sex diamonds.” So if those sound like your cup of…er…)

This might be one of my favorite novels that I’ve written; it’s one that’s lived in the back of my head for at least a decade. It’s technically a spin-off for a side character (in fact, the antagonist—though he’s not a bad person, just thoughtless!) from my short story “Sorceress,” which was my first-ever romance sale, way back then! I always knew the sequel was Lorre’s story: what does a magician do after he’s been reckless with his power and caused problems? And who would he fall in love with? The answer to the second question was, obviously, an Earnest Young Hero, someone who still believes that other people will help you if you ask them nicely, and who looks at a lonely and dangerous magician and asks how he can help, in turn.

(A fun and true trivia fact: Gareth’s name wasn’t necessarily going to be Gareth! I wasn’t sure it felt like him, but I needed to call him something—I thought I might change it later. But, around 30k in, I’d been writing him and thinking of him as Gareth, so…he was! And I actually quite like it now—the Arthurian reference fits nicely, I think. Gareth would also get along well with Prince Lir from Peter S. Beagle’s The Last Unicorn, I suspect…)

There are also nectarines. And some discussion of giant turtles. And a bandit or five.

Magician also has two of my favorites of my own ending lines—one for the main story and one for the epilogue. I sometimes find ending lines tricky, but both of these just turned up and felt right. (The last word of the novel overall, by the way, is “yes.” It’s an answer.)

I always write with music, and this playlist has a lot of The Proclaimers, The Pretty Reckless, and Volbeat on it—flavors of Edinburgh, of wild magic, of aging, of falling in love, of finding home at last. And some Against Me! because I suspect Lorre would sympathize with “I Was A Teenage Anarchist,” and The Cars’ “Magic” because, well, magic!

Here’s an excerpt, and buy links, and everything—I hope you enjoy this world and these characters. I’ve loved them for a very long time, and I’m excited to share. And if there’s a third story in this world, it’s got lesbian romance—a sorceress and a princess, in fact, but we’ll get there when we get there…

Buy Magician! JMS Books : Amazon

The beginning of Magician

Magician by Kristen Noone

The world’s greatest living magician, lying on his back on a rocky ledge halfway up a cliff and bathed in sunshine, felt the boat’s arrival on the island shore below like an uninvited knock at a private door. He did not enjoy it.

He didn’t move for a moment. He did not feel like it, and there’d be no rush. Nobody’d get past his wards.

He kept both eyes closed. Sun streaked red behind his eyelids; gold warmed his skin, his hair. His body soaked in the sensations of strong heated stone, sank into stone, became stone: learning how the rock felt when bathed in lush late-morning light. His edges blurred, softened: time slowed, thrummed, grew earthen and deep, salt-lapped and wind-etched. He might’ve been here for centuries, unhurried. Equilibrium and erosion, solidity and reshaping: a balance.

He had needed balance. Something he’d thought he’d known, once. Something he no longer understood.

He’d thought the island might help. Being rock for a while, or the wind, or the seaspray: being suspended amid them all. Being alone, because he was not sure he recalled how to be human, not well enough.

The island was warm—Lorre had always shamelessly adored being warm—and far enough from the mainland that he’d been mostly undisturbed, and close enough to trade routes that he could occasionally walk on water out to a boat and barter some repairs or some healing for some news of the Middle Lands and King Henry’s court at Averene and the Grand Sorceress Liliana. Lorre had promised not to magically check in on Lily or their daughter; he was attempting to keep that promise.

Equilibrium. Difficult. Sunlight was easier. Sunbeams were weightless. Stones did not have to think about human promises. Human perceptions.

The knock came again. It was not physical, or not entirely. It was a presence, an unexpected intruder standing below, shuffling feet in the sand and no doubt wondering where precisely a magician could be found, being faced with a towering blank cliff and no visible habitation.

Lorre sighed, pulled himself back from frayed edges and heavy sleepy light, and sat up, pulling a robe on in an unfussy tumble of blue and gold, mostly just because he liked the caress of silky fabric on bare skin. His senses shifted, dwindled: more human, though not entirely. He’d been a magician too long to not feel the threads of brilliance—cliff, vines, fish, grains of sand, sea-glass polished by waves—all around.

He peeked over the side of the ledge. Behind him the cave yawned lazily, reminding him of sanctuary: he could simply walk back inside, the way he had for several years now, and ignore the new arrival. That generally worked.

He was rather surprised someone’d found him at all. He wasn’t exactly hiding—oh yes you are, said a tart little voice in his head, one that sounded like Lily’s—but the island, after a bit of work on his part, nearly always concealed itself from maps and navigation charts. At the beginning a few enterprising adventurers had managed to track it down, young heroes on quests or proving their worth by daring an enchanter’s lair or begging for Lorre’s assistance in some revenge or inheritance or magical artifact retrieval scheme.

He’d ignored all but two of them. The illusion-wall kept everyone out, simple and baffling; the island had fresh water but little in the way of food. Mostly the adventurers’d given up and gone home, years ago; he couldn’t in fact recall the face of the last one. Two had become nuisances, loud and shouting; one of those had actually threatened to drink poison, melodramatically demanding Lorre’s assistance in collecting a promised bride from a glass mountain, claiming he’d die without her.

The young man currently standing on the beach was neither loud nor melodramatic. In fact, he was calmly considering the sheer cliff-face, which revealed nothing; he stepped back across the small curve of beach, shaded his eyes, seemed to be measuring. After a second he put a hand up, obviously checking the edge of the cliff: having noticed the very slight discrepancy where sea-birds dropped behind the illusion-wall a fraction sooner than they should vanish in reality.

Intelligent, this one. Lorre dangled himself over the ledge at an angle which would’ve been dangerous for anyone else, and watched.

The young man had dark reddish-brown hair, the color of autumn; he wore it tied back, though a few wisps were escaping. He’d dressed for travel, not in shiny armor the way some knights and princes had: sturdy boots and comfortable trousers, a shirt in nicely woven but also practical fabric, a well-worn pack which he’d swung down to the sand. He wasn’t particularly tall, but not short: average, with nicely shaped shoulders and an air of straightforward competence, not trying for impressive or intimidating.

Lorre, despite annoyance at the interruption, couldn’t help but approve. At least this one had some sense, and didn’t walk around clanking in metal under the shimmering sun.

The young man called up, “Hello?” His voice was quite nice as well, not demanding, lightly accented with the burr of the Mountain Marches but in the way of someone who’d been carefully sent to the best schools down South. “Grand Sorcerer?”

Lorre mentally snorted. He didn’t have a proper title, not any longer; if anyone did, it’d be Lily. His former lover, now wife of the brother of the King of Averene, was by default the last Grand Sorceress of the Middle Lands; she’d started up the old magician’s school again, welcoming and training apprentices. Lily always had been better with people. Lorre was not precisely welcome in Averene.

The young man said mildly, “I expect this is a test; I thought you would do that, you know,” as if he thought that Lorre might answer, as if they were having a conversation; and looked around. “I’m meant to find you, is that it?”

That was the opposite of it. Lorre on a good day barely recalled how to be human, and certainly wasn’t fit to interact with them. He’d lost his temper with the melodramatic poison-carrying prince, strolled invisibly onto the shore, asked the poison to turn itself into a sleeping draught, and then poured it into the idiot’s water flask. Then he’d found a passing ship and dumped the snoring body onto its deck. He hadn’t known the destination, and hadn’t bothered to find out.

His current young man was looking at driftwood. Lorre wondered why. He was getting a bit dizzy from leaning nearly upside down; he considered the sensation with some surprise. A swoop of gold swung into his eyes, distracting and momentarily baffling; he pushed the strands of his hair back with magic.

The young man found a stick, one that evidently met his standards for length and strength. He kept it in front of himself; he walked deliberately toward the cliff, and the illusion.

Oh. Clever. Avoiding traps. Testing a theory. Lorre found himself impressed, particularly when the young man watched the tip of the driftwood vanish and nodded to himself and then set rocks down to neatly mark the spot.

The island was not large, and the beach even smaller: a jut of cliff, a tangle of vines, a small lagoon and a trickle of water down to the shore. The illusion hid the cave-opening, but there wasn’t really anywhere else for someone to be; the young man figured that out within an hour or so of methodical exploration, and returned to the shore, and looked thoughtfully at the cliffs. He’d rolled up his sleeves and undone the ties of his shirt, given the heat; he had a vine-leaf in his hair, along with a hint of sweat.

Lorre, in some ways still very much human, couldn’t not stare. Something about those forearms under rolled-up sleeves. That hint of well-muscled chest. The casual ripple of motion, broad shoulders, heroic thighs.

“I suppose,” the young man said, very wry, still looking at the cliff as if perfectly aware Lorre was watching, “I should introduce myself. I think I forgot to, earlier.”

I suppose you should, Lorre agreed silently. Since you’re here. Disrupting my life.

He ignored the fact that he’d had no real plans. Meditation. Quiet. A hope for calm.

A hint of dragon-fire slid through his veins, under his skin. A memory. Restless. Beckoning. Dangerous.

Blurb: A magician in need of redemption. A loyal hero on a quest. And only one bed at the inn.

Once the world’s most legendary sorcerer, Lorre fled the Middle Lands after his own curiosity — and a misguided transformation spell—turned him into a dragon and nearly killed a king. He isn’t a dragon anymore, but he is hiding alone on a tropical island, avoiding people, politics, and his own reputation.

But now a hero has found him. And not just any hero. Prince Gareth’s full of patience, intelligence, a kind heart…and unfairly attractive muscles. And he needs Lorre’s help: his tiny mountain kingdom is under attack from ice magic, and Gareth hopes the world’s last great magician will save his people.

Lorre’s very much done with quests and princes and trying to change the world. But Gareth might tempt him to believe again…in heroes, in himself, and in magic.

Meet K. L. Noone

Merlyn the cat

K.L. Noone employs her academic research for writing romance, usually LGBTQ+ and often paranormal, fantasy, or historical! Her full-length romance novels include the Character Bleed trilogy (Seaworthy, Stalwart, and Steadfast), Cadence and the Pearl, and A Demon for Midwinter, available from JMS Books, and A Prophecy for Two, available from Inkshares. She’s also the author of multiple romance novellas and short stories with JMS Books, and previously with Less Than Three Press, Circlet Press, and Ellora’s Cave. Her non-romance fantasy fiction has appeared in Marion Zimmer Bradley’s Sword and Sorceress and the magazine Aoife’s Kiss.

With the Professor Hat on, she’s published scholarly work on romance, fantasy, and folklore, including a book on Welsh mythology in popular culture and a book on ethics in Terry Pratchett’s fantasy. She is happily bisexual, married to the marvelous Awesome Husband, and currently owned by a long-legged black cat named Merlyn.

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#TheWeekThatWas: Growing into yourself

I can’t remember what I wanted to be as a small child. But after I hit about fourteen, I had a plan that involved never marrying, living in a small, remote house with a garden and a duck pond; and keeping a flock of ducks and a string of lovers.

Mrs Duck, looking judgemental.

Some of this has happened. Some of it has been sadly lacking.

I grew up on a smallholding. My background is one where ones income comes from growing or making stuff and selling it. After I hit fifteen, my pocket money came from keeping a few dozen ex-battery hens and selling their eggs in the local market every weekend. Ma and Pa took a load of vegetables and flowers in to sell every Friday for the Saturday market and they’d take my eggs as well. Ma paid my sister’s school fees with the sales of apple pies and jam each weekend. She says she knew she had to make a certain amount every week to cover the bill, else that was that.

When I left home, I went to college for a bit and got a couple of degrees. I have never used the first one – Archaeology and History are fascinating but their real world applications are pretty minimal unless you want to actually work in the field – and in between that, I learned to copy- or audio-type at seventy words a minute whilst simultaneously holding a conversation about a completely different subject. That’s the most useful skill I have ever learned. And thinking about it, fantastic preparation for parenthood.

architecture building castle city
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

After a bit of time copy-typing and regretting my college choice, I fell in to a graduate degree in Geographical Information Systems, which was in its infancy then. Now, you can do an undergraduate course and specialise really early on, but then – the mid nineties – you could only go the postgraduate route. It seemed like a really good way to combine my interest in both the past and computers. Afterwards, I toyed with the idea of a doctorate, but in the end, I’d had enough of the ivory tower of academia and wanted to be back in the real world. Retrospectively, this may have been a mistake, but I was in my mid twenties and had a certain amount of judgemental arrogance. Instead, I went to work for a well known UK telecoms company and used the time to discover I really, really hated the corporate world and that the money for nice shoes, whilst lovely, wasn’t more important than my sanity.

I ended up quitting and teaching various levels of IT and office skills in an adult education setting. I loved it. My favourite class, ever, was made up of Hilda, Ada, Muriel and Betty. They had come to my ‘Computers For The Terrified’ class on a Friday afternoon as a change from their usual crochet sessions. Their average age was eighty and they were hilarious.

“Remind me how to save the file again, dear. I’m so sorry. I used to be able to remember things, but it’s all gone now.”

“I can’t get used to this mouse, Ally. My granddaughter has given me her old lapthing and it hasn’t got a mouse, it’s got a trackpad.”

“I’m so sorry dear. I have no idea how this came up on my internet search. I really wasn’t looking for naked men. It won’t get you in trouble with the centre, will it, that he’s got that big erection?”.

man standing on cliff watching punch bowl waterfalls
Photo by S Migaj on Pexels.com

At the same time, I was extracting myself from a relationship where my partner thought it was acceptable behaviour to throw me over the sofa. I eventually moved out and found myself a little house deeper in the Welsh valley I lived in – South Wales is a bit like Narnia, in that further up and further in is the way to go to uncover all the glories. The house was ten feet and one inch wide, with a garden a hundred feet long. I borrowed the money to renovate it from my father and did it up myself. I swore off relationships completely.

And then of course, OH turned up. I considered dating him simply because the house I had bought had no duck pond and I knew that my adolescent dream couldn’t come true whilst I was still there.

Twenty years later … I have had the duck pond. I have had the remote house. I have even had the string of lovers, a long time ago. But never all at once. And I’ve come to the conclusion that whatever you start off wanting – astronaut, scientist, writer, duck-keeper, Madame Bovary – you are pretty lucky if you hit that happy streak straight away. I think you’re more likely to find your groove by the process of elimination.

#AmReading

This week, three gay romances with lots of suspense. Hard Line by Sidney Bell, Box 1663 by Alex Sorel and Hell and Gone by Tal Bauer.

Hard Line by Sidney Bell

Hard Line by Sidney Bell, cover

Can I say first that I love all three books in this trilogy? This was the first one I read and it did stand alone; but obviously you’ll have more backstory if you start with Loose Cannon. This one is my favourite out of the three though. It’s about two misfits who are struggling to come to terms with themselves. Tobias is weighed down with his family obligations and has no head-space to work out what he really wants from life. Sullivan has shut down the part of his life that is open to relationships because he got burned really badly by someone who was frankly an arse to him about his kink. Combine the two likeable, well drawn characters with the realistic dom/sub relationship and a rollicking suspense plot and I couldn’t put the book down. The kink was really well done—on a par with Alexis Hall’s For Real. It’s a comfort re-read for me.

Box 1663 by Alex Sorel

Box 1663 by Alex Sorel, cover

This was rec’d me by a friend and I’m so pleased they did. It’s a WW2 gay romance set at Las Alamos, among the team building the nuclear bomb. A spy plot provides all the tension you could want. The romance is between an army photographer and a British scientist. The photographer, Nick, pursues Ian, the scientist. He’s lovely. He’s clearly head over heels in love with the man and Ian is carrying a whole load of angst and back-story that make it extremely hard for him to respond, even though he returns Nick’s feelings. I felt that the historical background was extremely well researched and I even went looking for photos of Oppenheimer and co so I could fill in the gaps in my internal narrative! I read the whole book in one sitting and I’ll definitely re-read.

Hell and Gone by Tal Bauer

Hell and Gone by Tal Bauer, cover

Another reliably re-readable (is that too alliterative?) contemporary who-dunnit-with-romance from Tal Bauer. This time our hero is a stock detective—a career I didn’t know existed!—who is sent into the Crazy Mountains of Montana to track down the person rustling cattle and now, killing people. Everett is drawn to Lawrence, the ranch manager who has been pushing for an investigation. But there’s a thundercloud of questions hanging over Lawrence’s head—his past, his relationship with the dead man he found hanging on his property, and where he’s getting his extra money from. The tension is beautifully spun out both with the investigation and the development of the relationship. Definitely a re-read.

That’s the lot for this time!

Taking Flight: Branwen’s Grave

So, it’s release day for Taking Flight! Yay! I’ve been around and about visiting at various blogs over the last few days…Nell Iris (10th), Holly Day (11th), Addison Albright (today!) and I’ll be over at Ofelia Grand’s place on the 16th.

Taking Flight by A. L. Lester. A short contemporary gay romance in the Celtic Myths collection.

Taking Flight is based on a tale from The Mabinogion, about Brânwen, sister of King Brân of Wales. Her brother marries her off to Matholwch, King of Ireland, but the marriage goes bad for complicated reasons to do with her step-brother mutilating her husband’s horses. Once Matholwch gets her home to Ireland, he banishes her to his kitchens. She tames a starling and sends it with a message to her brother for help. I’ve made the Brânwen character a trans man called Gwyn; and he extracts himself from his own difficulties with the help of Darren Starling rather than passively waiting to be rescued.

It’s a tiny, tiny bit of the whole legend. The tales in the Mabinogion tend to be very complicated and pretty dark and wouldn’t fit into a short story. They were handed down orally in Wales until they were written down in the twelfth and thirteenth centuries.

My background before I was a parent, a writer, a chicken-farmer, an audio-visual technician, an IT teacher and an IT professional was archaeology and history. I have always thought of myself as an Archaeologist and/or a Historian—I studied both at York for three years. However, I have never been on a dig! It’s a weird way to still self-identify thirty years after my time in that world ended; but I still do. I read a lot of history and of course I write historical stories. Even these Contemporary Celtic Myths are based in the past.

For some of the saints stories, there are obvious bits of physical evidence tied in with them. There’s a St Dwynwen’s Chapel on Anglesey—the one with the well full of fortune-telling eels I mention in Playing Chicken. St Kevin from As the Crows Fly has a hermit’s cave you can look at in a valley in Ireland. But the tales in the Maginogion go back far beyond the Christian era.

There’s no actual evidence for the Irish King Matholwch ever existing, I understand he only appears in the Mabinogion. It’s probable he was a minor leader, obviously near the coast because he had ships. The one thing that is possible evidence for the story being true is the Bronze Age burial mound known as Bedd Branwen on the Isle of Anglesey. This is such a good article, I do recommend it, there are links to the Mabinogion and photos of the site. In the tale, after lots of war and horrible things only eight people were left in Ireland and eight in Wales. The Welsh came home and

“…they came to land at Aber Alaw, in Talebolyon, and they sat down to rest. And Branwen looked towards Ireland and towards the Island of the Mighty, to see if she could descry them. “Alas,” said she, “woe is me that I was ever born; two islands have been destroyed because of me!” Then she uttered a loud groan, and there broke her heart. And they made her a four-sided grave, and buried her upon the banks of the Alaw.”

When Bedd Branwen was excavated in the 1960s by Frances Lynch, various Bronze Age burial urns and grave-goods were found and the site was dated to between 1650BC-1400BC.

So the original story had its seeds sown 3,500 years ago.

I find this absolutely fascinating. Oral history has handed that story down in one form or another with embellishments and omissions for all those years and in all those different languages. What we have in The Mabinogion is a faint echo of the past, resonating down the years from a small grave-mound by an insignificant river in a far corner of Europe.

Anyway. Here’s the blurb for Taking Flight. I do apologise for missing out the bit about the resurrection cauldron, but I just couldn’t get it in and keep the word-count low enough!

Contemporary Celtic Myths by A. L. Lester. Queer Romance short stories. Cover of Playing Chicken, As the Crows Fly, Taking Flight.

Taking Flight

Taking Flight, Cover

Gwyn Mabler is on secondment at the Kings of Ireland Hotel at Tara. He and his brother Brân are in the process of buying the place and Gwyn is getting to grips with the everyday running by shadowing the current owner, Mal Reagan.

Gwyn’s an idiot, though. Mal made it clear from the start he’d like to get Gwyn in his bed and after a couple of weeks of pursuit, Gwyn gave in. Mal was hot and pushy and just the kind of dangerous to pique Gwyn’s interest. He honestly thought Mal knew he was trans.

Since that horrible night, Mal has had Gwyn ‘workshadowing’ Chef in the deeply unhappy kitchen. He doesn’t want to go home and cause a fuss that might make the sale fall through, but when a huge row breaks out over a flour delivery and Mal backhands Gwyn across the face, he finally decides enough is enough. With the help of Darren Starling, one of the line-cooks with whom he’s formed a tentative friendship, he leaves.

During the two-day journey from the middle of Ireland home to Wales they have plenty of time to exchange confidences. Could the delicate pull of attraction between them grow into something stronger? Is it safe for Gwyn to out himself to Darren? Will Darren want to go out with a trans guy? And how will his brother Brân take Gwyn’s arrival home with a stranger?

A 14,500-word short story in the Reworked Celtic Myths series.

Buy Taking Flight: Amazon USAmazon UK Everywhere Else!

Taking Flight banner. A short gay romance in the Celtic Myth collection.